Hung out with people from work today. We looked like such an odd bunch while playing pool. I kept on hearing about the party last night, and how Michael got into an accident (the latter story was repeated many times).
I don't really know what all these people think of me... I find myself not liking that whole scene. So much drama. Everyone seems to like everyone else. 
More to write, but I am tired. Maybe tomorrow.

I love the scene in Lost in Translation where Bill Murray is golfing with Mt. Fuji in the background. The whole setting is so picturesque - I can see now why the woodblock artists, mainly Hokusai and Hiroshige were so fascinated with and used the mountain as a recurring motif in their artwork.
ah, I really want to see Japan again.

So I graduated on Friday and I started my summer by taking a deep plunge into 3 bottles of high end alcohol and premium bud. This does not bother me... it almost seems like a perfect event to get fully intoxicated for the first time. But it was kind of odd that I was with three girls who for the past three years, I have not particularly taken a liking to. Specifically E. I thought of her as a pretentious showy moron who constantly felt the need to prove her "cultured" personality to everyone. It was only recently when I adapted a new view on life, and oh so graciously took a new view of her. I'm almost positive that she had, for this long shared the same contempt for me. I guess I am just fascinated at how fast relationships can change. I have always been appalled that huge groups of friends would get annoyed with each other so easily, create drama, etc. etc. It is a bit hard to go into detail, but for this I would sometimes take pleasure in the fact that I am more so an introvert. But getting back on topic, I have never stepped back, and really taken a view of myself in the world. Perhaps it was out of fear of seeing myself as a hypocrite?
Anyhow, I now find myself becoming a bit more social, connecting with those I would normally be highly judgmental of. Now I just feel indifferent to everything (possible effects of the Fountainhead?).

I watched three chick flicks in a row yesterday. ack! I think I needed somewhere to confess that. I will hopefully be going to SF tomorrow, for the sake of going... no, not for the sake of going, but to try and soak up all that I can from California before leaving the country for a year. I would also like to try Big Sur- I have wanted to go every since my Kerouac fanaticism back in 9th grade. A hike in muir woods sounds good to, as well as a trip to monterey, santa cruz, and yosemite. There isn't enough time!

My "venting" posts so often sound incredibly melodramatic and unnecessary yet I need somewhere to put all my angry thoughts and emotions.
Really now, I am tired of being taken for granted.... it seems as though people are constantly putting me down just to increase their own narcissistic personality. Yet, I feel that I should try and maybe change myself, because anything that comes out of my mouth is never what I intend. Maybe I'm just not a people person.
Anyhow, just this week of school work, next week is all the over glorified graduation crap, and the rest of the days till July I can just work and forget about the rest. Then India, then Germany.
I am so glad that I am getting out of this damn place. Really- there is absolutely no one that I will miss greatly, and I can say that with confidence. (I might add that pessimism is also taking over me).

I think that I just need to take a breather to realize that my world isn't so bad, and neither are the people.... thats what I usually do.
All I want to focus on now is educating myself further- and not deal with all this crap.

(I know I am going to look back at this post and wonder: What was I thinking?)

Ahhhhh this week. What a mess. But now its almost over.
I was talking to this boy Naoki in my class after the AP English test, and he is going to college in Tokyo for the next four years. He said that I was always welcome to go and visit- he would be more than happy to show me around. Naoki is pretty cool. He was born in Japan but grew up here...we both share a liking for Murakami and I guess we connected somewhat on this level.
I am excited about my year abroad. I was the one who always said that I would hate to live my whole life in the US. I guess I am just doing it earlier than expected.